A Vegi-tale.

A vegetarian?  *snickers

What. An. Idiot.  Probably doesn’t even know Jesus. 

Over the years I wondered with much scoffing and mockery why any one would intentionally deny themselves something so wonderful and assuring as meat.  I would pity vegetarians, knowing that their reasons of morality and health were superficial and insubstantial. 

Protecting animals?  Ha.  David killed a lion with his bare hands.  Sorry PETA, we’re made to kill animals.  It’s why we have thumbs and why we’re so much more smarter. 

And you want to be healthy?  Well Jacob, the Bible does say to treat your body as a holy temple.  My response, you’re taking that way too symbolically.   How many animals were killed in the temple for sacrifice…?  Answer:  Not enough. 

Meat for the stomach and the stomach for meat.  That’s what I say. 

Or rather, that’s what I did say. 

I am now on Day 3 of Vegetarian Month.   Yes, I am giving up meat for a month.  Beginning on Black Friday and lasting until Righteous Sunday (or what some call Christmas) I shall be meatless. 

The seed was planted the other week when I was eating breakfast with a few friends, consisting of bacon and eggs cooked in bacon grease (not a lot of bacon grease, just a dabble).  We found ourselves conversing of health and the impact of working out and dieting, making me well aware that I do neither.

I don’t work-out, at least consistently, for many reasons:

1.     I’m Asian.

2.     God blessed me with permanently toned biceps.

3.     I have asthma.

4.     Gym memberships cost money. 

5.     I don’t own anything sleeveless.

6.     I’m left handed.

As you can see I’m up against some daunting barriers.  Therefore dieting would appear to be my only other option to fight the onslaught of a failing metabolism.  (As I am Asian, the metabolic decay begins at age fifty so I do have a while before I need to get “serious.” But better to set good patterns sooner than later.)

This health reason was much better than my original reason, that of simple, unrepentant pride.  “Of course I could go without meat for a month.  I’m a man!” (Paraphrasing)

Another goal for this month is that as I diversify my eating habits I will also diversify my cooking repertoire.   I really do love to cook but I am not very creative or motivated, which results in a lot of eggs and bacon, sandwiches of various sorts, and frozen pizzas.  The plan is to get me to think outside of the box, get more fruits and vegetables on the plate, and therefore make me a better human being - physically, morally, and attractively…

Only time will tell if this month significantly changes eating habits.  However, if this permanently makes me a vegetarian then something has gone horribly, horribly wrong.  I’ll be like Dr. Frankenstein, with the cure being an equal and opposite experiment of eating only meat for an entire month.  It’d be disgusting, but necessary.  And, if we're honest and decent people, it’d probably be the more impressive feat…  *considering