Sunday, June 10, 2012

How to maintain your blog


A lot of people start blogs with the intention of consistency and regularity. They have high hopes of daily posts, and maybe when times are busy, a post a week.  They may start off strong but in the end their blog posts begin to dry up to maybe once every month to eventually never blogging ever.  (Which is probably a good thing as there are a lot of boring people out there).  (Just kidding.  Everyone has a story)  (But seriously, some stories are better than others.) I’m even guilty of this trend.  As you can see my May posts were few and far between.  Here are some tips to keep your blog afloat and increase that weak and dying post count. 

1.     Not everything you have to write about needs to be clever, witty, or insightful.  – Everyone thinks that he or she is the funniest or deepest or smartest person to have existed.  Not true.  This is my problem.  I don’t write because I feel the need to be super clever.  Just write and something will come of it.  As the saying goes, even poop can be gold.

2.     Don’t think about how many people are reading your blog – Numbers aren’t everything.  But they’re really nice.  But then it begins to add pressure to ideas and then you freeze and come up with nothing. 

3.     Don’t proofread, don’t care about grammar – One of the major reasons I don’t blog as often is because it takes me way too long time to write a post as I’m meticulously proofreading.  The majority of your readers aren't even going to be smart enough to cacth your mistakes anyways.

Sub note: Here’s a free lesson I’ve learned (despite many corrective comments on pretty much every paper I wrote in high school and college), use commas everywhere.

4.     Use a quote as a post – Easy and simple.  Quote someone, put it on a colorful background and bam.  Got a good one.  And if you’re Christian (or even if you’re not) just make the quote by C.S Lewis – even if it’s fake (especially if it’s fake).  It’ll make you sound really smart, and it’ll get you a lot of followers. 

5.     Post a song – Another one that is easy.   Middle school mixtape number 8: Love You For Reals Girl.

6.     Post a picture – Any picture, because at worst it’s a bad picture, and then you just say that it’s something abstract.  So deep. Too deep. Real deep.

7.     Just write about every moment of everyday of your life.  – This may seem mundane and it may seem boring and irrelevant but you’ll eventually strike gold.  If anything, tell a story about your day and then add a Bible verse at the end to make it seem like you ambiguously learned something. For example:

“Today I brushed my teeth and I was reminded of the cleanliness and redemptive quality of the gospel.  As John writes: “Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” – John 15:27b 

8.     Make a list.  – Everyone loves lists and countdowns and you can drag it out real slow like.  A post explaining the list, a post for honorable mentions, and then a single post for each number.  Puff it up baby.  (I should have done that with this post…)

9.     Plagiarize – No one checks sources these days.  You’re not writing a thesis.  It’s ok.  Just steal it.  Intellectual property is a lie from hell. 

10.  Finally, remember that blogging in its nature is narcissistic, so embrace it.  A lot of people passively admit this (cough links on Facebook… cough), and few will explicitly express their self-absorbed intentions.  Write a lot, and don’t be ashamed.  Begin every blog with this sentence: “This will be the greatest thing you will have ever read.”  Whether this is true or not, it will at least give you the momentary confidence to complete a post.

“The most beautiful thing about blogging, is the metaphorical relevance of our desperate search for truth.  And search we must.” – C.S. Lewis (from Prince Caspian)

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